Sunday, March 15, 2009

She's a Woman

Hello everyone!

Okay so, I have been thinking over a couple of things lately, and I just knew I had to put it up as a post. That’s what our blogs are for, right? The best way to share our thoughts and have others tell their views about it. Sadly, I didn’t find that certain something in me to write it properly. So this post is going to sound pretty random, kindly forgive me for that.

To start with, I am totally against the people who think having a baby boy is better than having a baby girl. Society has developed so much, but even today, there are people who prefer having a boy over having a girl. I mean why? Is it the poor baby’s fault that it’s a she? We read in books that in Saudi Arabia, before the dawn of Islam, people used to bury their new born alive if it was a girl. Okay so we are civilized enough not to do it today. But how better are we today? I take immense pride in saying I belong to a learned and educated family of Lahore. Someone in my distant family had a baby girl and strangely they didn’t call up and tell. We heard it from somewhere else. Around a month later, I got a chance to talk to the parents and what they said just disgusted me. They told me they’d been happier if it was a boy and then they would have gladly come to tell us the great news. I felt sorry for the poor fellows. The father was a Chartered Accountant in some well known company and the mother was an Architect, working with one of the leading architects here in Pakistan. We’ve all heard education polishes us. Well does it?

Last night, we had someone over. It was papa’s friend from a long time back, quite younger than him. But it’s like, I remember him from the earliest time my mind can take me to. Now, uncle had brought mithai (sweets) because he had just become father of a son. I knew very well he already has three daughters and he never did that when they were born. I grew sad at the thought.

Are girls secondary to boys? Rather, is there any comparison? I don’t think there is, because society is not complete without either of them. Are such people not as happy as when a son is born? How can a parent’s heart be so cold? I fail to understand! How can they be like that? And people, that doesn’t stop here does it? This is just the beginning for those poor girls and goes on and on throughout their lives. Well in most cases it does. I have gone over this debate with my mother quite a many times and she always makes a point to tell me that papa and her were as much happy to have me as when they were when any of my brothers were born. Probably happier.

She is a woman. With courage, with strength, with that something beautiful about her. Can't they see she's the one who's gonna be papa's little girl or the one right beside her mother helping her with chores when she gets old and can no longer do it. She's gonna be that person who will always sacrifice her own happiness for the happiness of others. Can't they see, she's the one who bears all that pain just to give a family their heir? And they feel sorry when she is born! Huh! It's sad, it's so unfair... it's such an animal like behavior!

Well that’s all for now. That’s one less on the list of things messing up with my brain these days hehe! You guys are just wonderful, you never complain do you? Hehe!

Till next time, take very good care of yourself and those around you!


29 blandishes:

Anonymous said...

my parents have four daughters only.
and maybe initially my dad had this craze about having a baby boy! but then it dawned on my dad how lucky he was.
son is a son until he gets himself a wife a daughter is a daughter all her life!

Jinxed Pixie said...

see, you are wrong when you say that it ain't the baby's fault that it's a she...i mean why should being a female count as a "fault"...

wonderful post...
me liked it a lot..

WarmSunshine said...

@ Seher

i was trying to recall that last line, but wasn't successful. Thanks for writing it here :)
and thanks for reading


WarmSunshine said...

@ Jinxed Pixie

thanks Pixie :) I'm glad you liked it babes :)

yamini meduri said...

i take all the pain to survive
now, living alone with everyone around
i smiled, when i was supressed
i cried, when i am only alone

i ran to school, washing all the dishes
i tried to play, but never allowed to
i thought to be some one big
now i knew, i can never be

i fought the world, lived all myself
i was special to only me
no one shared my feelings
i bore all the pain, all the grief

never was the world concerned about me
never they thought of my smiles
always thought, i am a fault to have
i am the baby girl, trying to smile

but i know,
one day the same world stand with me
expecting me to give birth to a baby boy
should my child suffer like me, i think
but i feel, atleast my girl will change the world..!!!

Phoenix said...

me loves the post too and i second american desi when she says-son is a son until he gets himself a wife a daughter is a daughter all her life!

see this gender discrimination is utterly barbaric and disgusting... i know my mom had to face the brunt of having me because she has two daughters.. but i know she is happy with em n id love to have a baby girl to fuss over and make her tough like me.. and prove to her that im the best mom she could ever get...

anyway another thing id like to put forward is... im gald now days soaps liek balika vadhu and the ladli and etc.. are focusing on [female] infanticide hopefully people will wake up and protest to this social evil...

well written post... :)

WarmSunshine said...

@ Yamini

My dear, that was really really touching... it almost brought tears to me!

WarmSunshine said...

@ Raka

I feel bad to hear that sweety, though i don't know you much, but the little i have read your work, i knew instantly you are made of strong stuff. Even i wish to have a daughter, who will be my best friend, as i have no sister and have missed out on a good frndship.


just wanted to hug ya!

Renu said...

son is a son until he gets himself a wife a daughter is a daughter all her life----I dont believe in this line and i can say proudly my son cares for me more than any daughter would do, but at the same time I love my daughter equally, when she was born, I wanted a girl, not a boy, she is the apple of my eye and was a really pampered one. For me my both the children are dear, nothing more nothing less....really equal in all things and ways. I dont like this ..making the boys less imprtant to give more importance to girls......For me both are important , both are precious.

Anonymous said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Anonymous said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Miss Ilashree Goswami said...

Ouuh dear, we are miles apart, yet not so far, and still carve a similar story..... I too come from a good Indian family background, and time and again I have been subjected to this kind of gender rationalism at my home..... Earlier I would fight over it with mom, but later I realized, its not her fault, its the way our society sees us.....

Sometimes I just laugh it over, and many a times, sulk silently to solitude.....

We don't have much options, do we?

Keep writing, loved your blog. And hey, what's your name? I couldn't find an 'About Me' page in your bolg !!

Check out my blog sometime, we write on such similar thoughts :)


StepMAN (Superheroes ka Baap) said...

i bet u are inspired from few hindi serials here in india....oh sorry for a moment i forgot that u wre from pakistan.......yes yes the hindi channels used to telecast such programs which are thought here to save girls all over the world....thats wht i am doing in brazil right now

case here is disastrous..... girls here in brazil r asked to attend swimming classes at a very early age of 3 so that later in future they will become a supermodel gisele bundchen ,isabelle fontana etc....... thats the reason why i am still stranded in brazil....i miss pakistan,i miss india,i miss my alien friends in i have decided for once...i will fight against injustice and protect girl childs in world....... . join me in the campaign .....

StepMAN...Superheroes ka baap..

Onthewingsofadream said...

touching article ....

I feel so lucky to have a mom who declared' when i bear both my kids for 9 months , had similar labour pains ,breast fed them both, how can one be more favorite than other' relatives used to stuned ...and its equally pleasant to know that my dad distributed laddoos to whole of society ...

I wish every girl child gets her due love and respect ...

яノςんム said...

i am in love with this post. you have stated almost the similar things in a subtler way which i stated in a recent post of mine in a loud way.. In India, people are under an impression tht if the cremation ceremonies are done by son, they ll reach heaven and also things like sons take care of thier parents in their ld ages.
I am not saying wrt to Ms. Renu, tht sons are useless creatures, but how justified is it to over see a daughter and treat hr like an unwanted presence?
I feel blessed to have been born in a family tht treats both sexes equally, rathr, i would say, my younger brother is always complaining tht our parents pamper and love me more than him :D

but it doesnt end here, wen i see around myself, it is suffocating to see tht educated mothers are willingly getting illegal abortions done in the desire of a male child.
But thank god things are changing.. Now ppl are realising tht girl child isnt a curse, and th declining sex ration has also brought them notice..

lolz, i guess, i have written a long post instead of a comment :D

WarmSunshine said...

@ Renu

i respect ur views. my mum would say the same. but what the post discusses here is the attitude of "ppl" when girls are born

Glad to have you around :)

WarmSunshine said...

@ Aji

thanks for reading and commenting so sweetly :)

WarmSunshine said...

@ Miss IIshree

That was a very sweet comment to begin with. Yes true, that's the way our society sees it.

Well this is a group blog.
You can find me here:

WarmSunshine said...

@ Stepman

hehe awww that's so sweet of you to help those poor girls :P

hope you'll save the day when we need it :D


WarmSunshine said...

@ On the Wings of a Dream

That's really heart warming to know :) Thank you for dropping by and taking out the time to read this

take care!


WarmSunshine said...

@ Richa

smiled all the way through ur comment babes :) I feel so good being appreciated by such lovely ladies here :)

Wish you well in life

take care! :)

Té la mà Maria - Reus said...

very good blog, congratulations
regard from Reus Catalonia
thank you

sanely insane said...

boys, girls...what are beautiful

Amrita~Ams said...

luv u yar..
seriously mast post :)

tc :)

owais said...


Amazing post. Actually in my family its the other way around. We are four brothers and we really wish that we had sisters in our family as well:).

Anyway just to add to your post, we once conducted a reaserch for a course regarding gender discrimination in employement and we went to this certain city in Sindh. Few of the reason that made me laugh were these:

1)Men tend to do more work than women.

2) Men are more professional than women.

3)Women usually have issues with late sittings.

4) Men don't need pregnancy leaves.

WarmSunshine said...

@ Té la mà Maria - Reus

thank you from me and my partners in crime :P

WarmSunshine said...

@ sanely insane

thanks for reading :)

WarmSunshine said...

@ Amrita

thanks girl :)


WarmSunshine said...

@ Owais

that was reallyyyyy funny :)
thanks for sharing... needed a laugh at the moment :)